I was sitting in my underwear on the computer, as you are going to find me pretty much every afternoon, when my landlord and another guy busted through my front door.
Me “Dude, you need to knock!”
Land Lord “What? I try calling you but your phone is off!”
Me “My phone is right next to me! You can’t come barreling into people’s houses without knocking!”
LL “We thought no one home.”
Me “Well maybe knock next time to be sure.”
LL “I try calling you.”
I couldn’t seem to get that whole knocking point across to him. Oh well. Apparently my water heater had broken and was causing problems throughout the building. Every apartment out here has a little switch that controls the water heater. They asked me how long I had left mine on for. I told them 3 hours. It was probably closer to 20, but I wanted to play things safe for the moment. Apparently the whole apparatus had gotten way too hot and started melting it’s rubber casing. They were quite upset about this. ODWB even popped in to see what the ruckus was about. At one point, as inevitably happens when 3 Isralies are in close proximity, they all started shouting at the top of their lungs. I am pretty sure all their cell phones were ringing the entire time as well. They would alternate between shouting at each other and at whoever was on the other end of their calls. I heard “ang-leet” thrown about a few times, so I thought they might be talking about who would speak english to the punk who almost ruined the hot water supply for the whole building. Eventually the landlord turned to me:
LL “One hour is all you need! Then turn button off.”
Me “You need to knock before you come in here! And don’t leave dirt everywhere like you did last time!”
LL “One hour then off!”
Me“Ok, well if the thing is going to break after an hour maybe there should be a timer on it.”
LL “There is, or entire thing exploded.”
That I don’t doubt. I better start paying more attention before I wake up and my house is knee-deep in scalding water.
Few other notes:
I keep getting these semi important texts that I can’t read cause i am too cheap to get a new phone. My screen broke months ago and now I can only read the first 3-4 words of every text, and only when tilting the screen at an absurd angle. I have told people I know to keep everything short and to the point, or better yet to call me. It becomes a problem when I get texts from people I don’t know. I got one this morning from my would be physical therapist that said “hi, call me…” and then an unknown word and some other garble. Call him now? Later? Damn, I should shell out a few shekels for a new phone that isn’t 3 years old, smashed, and looks like it could have come as the prize in a box of cereal.
The texting was also an issue last week when the team captain, who usually gives me rides to practice, sent one out that read “we going to be…” at around 11 PM one night. I assumed he was talking about going out to a club that night, because 11 is when those party coordinating texts usually get bandied about. I responded with “I’m good, thanks.” The next day I showed up to the gym and realized I had missed a players only meeting. Apparently that text ended in “…meeting as a team at 12 PM.” Whoops. So my man just assumed I was injured and didn’t need to bother participating in an impromptu team meeting.
This was probably the only time it has been beneficial to me that you become a forgotten man if you are injured. None of the coaches cared, or possibly even noticed, that a player blew off a team meeting, players only or otherwise. Things have really changed since college. I felt bad about it, but in all honesty I am anti players only meetings anyway. I have never, ever been on a team where something good came out of one. They are just forums for the respected people on the team to throw out platitudes and clichés, like “we have to come together!” and “everyone needs to make sacrifices!” I am going to do a post soon on my experiences with team meetings and all the ridiculous things that have gone on. There has been backstabbing, lies and even straight up spying.